Bush 1 died last week. The presidents were all there in the front row with their wives. It’s crazy to see it. In that one snapshot you’ve got it all – the old ways and new, conservative and liberal, black and white, those who come from money and those who came from love. I wonder, could every member of this nation look to one of them up there and feel represented? Probably not. We’re a country of mutts and mongrels, mixed and bi and trans and poly. We’re all hyphenated and made of the stuff of LOOK AT WHO THE FUCK i AM!
But, there was something comforting about seeing all of them on display like that …presidential ducks in a row … having to do this thing that, more than likely, none of them wanted to do. Cuz, who wants to go to a funeral? Even worse, having to do it in front of all of us, their constituents, their citizens, fans, critics, supporters, haters …their nation. To be set up for viewing like a product line, with their liquid insides churning and gurgling, and forced to smile and fix their faces to look pleased as punch to be there. For some reason, that put me right at ease.
We are vultures. We are fools We don’t love We love too much
God bless this nation bless us all blessings seem to have run out flood worn down to an anemic trickle blessings are flecks of gold rush scattered along wagon trails blessings can’t make bail blessing are paving the road to a great migration blessings can’t come when you got no idea how that rope came to be tied ’round your neck blessings can’t unbury themselves blessings been shot in the back by a Chicago cop blessings been rotting away in a torture cell on the west side come on over here, step right up and get your blessings I got 40 acres and a tax break with your name on it.
People sacrifice the present for the future. But life is available only in the present. That is why we should walk in such a way that every step can bring us to the here and the now.
Thich Nhat Hanh
This poem is a dialogue, a conversation between two beings about relationship. When I’d finished writing it, I realized that each stanza was strong enough to stand alone. This is the last of a series of four posts featuring each section of the poem. See it below in it’s entirety.
points of contact
We are points of contact upon the plane of one another’s existence. I am from the 9th dimension, and you can’t see even 10% of me; just a tiny sliver. It isn’t my choice. I didn’t make the rules. I’m trying to show you all of me. Really, I’m just being me. Just being. But the laws of the universe, ya know? You keep getting upset with me because you can’t understand. Closed and withheld, that’s what you say. I can hear you now …
“You know what you’re like? You’re like a prized can of jellied cranberry sauce; an unexpected guilty treat, long forgotten since the last of the wrapping paper was put back into the attack and then discovered once again while freshening for spring. You’re there, and not. You’re here, but absent. You’re with me, and yet, so so far away.
I’m yours. I can feel that. You know I’m yours, right? But you? Somehow you’re mine and yet, you’re too much for me to claim. And I feel taunted. Yet, you are not the one taunting me. Who taunts me? It’s my own lack. My own inability to inhabit you, while you fully inhabit me.”
… You worry on and on about what you don’t know. what you didn’t order. the man you didn’t marry, the job you didn’t take. You think so much on the colors you cannot see and the whispers you’re ears aren’t tuned to hear. Just be here. With me, my love. And wrap you flesh in my flesh. And bury your tears in my hair. And let me love you while our planes intersect.
Writing is as much a part of me as is my gender. Or, maybe it’s more like my shoe size.
.-Me, in response to my inner hater who keeps asking, “Who the F&#% are you to self-publish a poetry book?”
I just released my first collection of poems and sketches titled, Love Cycle. The book is a dive into the cycle of romantic relationships. Or, maybe it’s be a deep dive into one of the many cycles that we rotate through over the course of a long term romantic relationship. Even though I obviously wrote the poems myself, I keep finding new meanings and new connections every time I had to re-read them while going through the editing and design process.
I hope some of you out there might also find meaning and connection in my words and images. Love Cycle is available on Amazon for $10. Here’s a sneak preview…
In recent weeks, I’ve been watching and listening to a lot of media related to topics like the multiverse, the tesseract and time travel. Could this be flavoring my writing? Or, maybe it’s the writing that has fueled my desire to take in all this futuristic content. But probably, something much larger than me is behind all of it. I’ve learned to pay attention to the nuances of my appetites and cravings. Every external act is a manifestation of an internal thought.